Ive been doing good on posting with specific topics past few months, but see that pace sort of fell off. Its not so much that i cant write new things as much as i feel im starting to burnout. And just want to breakout of the shackles of structure and must doings. I made some loose goals this year to blog more, do Duolingo. Volunteer at farmers market. Daily time spent on the brilliant app i bought. And well. Its the last month of the year. Its sort of like the playoffs. And i feel in some ways like im starting to checkout of my goals. Its feeling abit confronting to see what capacity i have. My mind has so much more energy then my body, and that can be challenging to let it run the show. Trying to let it be. To show up even tired or exhausted. Not the easiest task. Is it any different then alot of athletes?
I guess thats where the question of workaholic comes in. Setting goals that perpetually keep you more busy then not. Now i acknowledge these goals dont realistically take too much time. They are not hours each. And in someways its the fact i havent fully committed to them that makes them harder. I do them sort of on a whim when i remember. I just find my intention at the beginning of the year isnt really matching my execution at the end of the year. Feeling more drained. And just wanting to focus on one or two of them. Well. For now my goal is to follow through. And then take these lessons into next year. Live in that discomfort that ive over committed and also acknowledge your coming close to the finish line. Dont quit yet. Dont jump yet. Workaholic? Or just expected fatigue. The struggles to even keep up reasonable expectations. Very possible and realistic. And to see where i loose momentum. The better things are. In some ways the less motivation i get. Why bother sort of energy. Its all a mental framing. Own the goals you set for this year. If you see them through youll really experience what too much is. If you loose accountability, youll just do the same thing in a few years from now. Try to keep balanced and structured, even if you crave to rebel and deny it. Itll sort itself out. Dont have to be perfect. Or a workaholic. But try.
Living in Free Fall 